Your Life and Regret – קואצ’ר לחיים
Firstly, I’m going to break some bad news to you. You’re going to die.
Moreover, when you die you’re going to have some regrets.
I don’t want to be morbid, but I do want to be realistic in stating that we will all have 2 types of regrets when we die.
Regret Type Number One
The first type of regret is completely avoidable. Moreover, you should probably do your best to experience this type of regret. This regret is the type of regret we have when considering the things that we did NOT say, or the things we did NOT do.
We experience this regret when we think back on the girl / guy we didn’t ask out on a date. Maybe there were times when we didn’t say what we felt, or we didn’t take action when we know we should have.
On your deathbed, seconds before you die, maybe you will regret not following your heart more, or chasing your inner-dreams. You will probably regret the things you DIDN’T do, MORE than the things that you DID do. Only you will know, and it will depend on the type of life you lived up until that point.
Nonetheless, let’s talk about two ways to avoid this first type of regret.
1. Put your ego to the side, and take more risks emotionally. Pride can be a great ally, but pride can hurt you if it induces a fear of being vulnerable, or embarrassed.
2. Always chase your dreams. You will never regret the things that you tried / try your hardest to do. If you try to follow your dreams and fail in completely achieving them, there is no way you’re going to regret making that effort. Always chase your dreams.
Regret Type Number Two
Life is not to be lived in solitude. Humans are tribal by nature. Which means that this second type of regret is damn near unavoidable. The second type of regret is the regret we will have about the things that we DID say, or the things that we DID do.
You’ve hurt people when you’ve acted out of raw emotion, and there is no way you could ever take those words or actions back. Time doesn’t work that way. Maybe you’ve acted rashly and irrationally out of anger, jealously, lust, envy, gluttony, or greed. I know that I have acted rashly and irrationally many times in the past, and I still do no matter how hard I try not to.
So what can we do about it? How can we minimize these inescapable forms of remorse?
Let’s talk about two ways I think we can avoid this second type of regret.
1. It is important to act out of emotion in the right way but in this case, you should probably be more conscious of your actions. Try to think with the logical part of your brain before you accidently inflict pain on other people. Meaning I want you consciously and purposely contemplating your instincts before you act upon them.
2. Try to breathe whenever you are in a position of overwhelming negative emotion. Especially, when you are liable to deflect or redirect that negativity onto people. The key thing will be to take calming, relaxing breaths (refer to chapter on breathing techniques) that will re-center you emotionally.
Your Personal Challenge:
Try to live your life looking forward, and don’t hold onto the avoidable or the unavoidable feelings regret. Learn from your mistakes but remember that holding onto regret can & will never help you.
About the Author of : Your Life and Regret – קואצ’ר לחיים