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Your Life and Regret – קואצ’ר לחיים

Firstly, I’m going to break some bad news to you. You’re going to die.

Moreover, when you die you’re going to have some regrets.

I don’t want to be morbid, but I do want to be realistic in stating that we will all have 2 types of regrets when we die.

 

Regret Type Number One

 

The first type of regret is completely avoidable.  Moreover, you should probably do your best to experience this type of regret.  This regret is the type of regret we have when considering the things that we did NOT say, or the things we did NOT do.

 

We experience this regret when we think back on the girl / guy we didn’t ask out on a date.  Maybe there were times when we didn’t say what we felt, or we didn’t take action when we know we should have.

 

On your deathbed, seconds before you die, maybe you will regret not following your heart more, or chasing your inner-dreams.  You will probably regret the things you DIDN’T do, MORE than the things that you DID do.  Only you will know, and it will depend on the type of life you lived up until that point.

 

Nonetheless, let’s talk about two ways to avoid this first type of regret.

 

1. Put your ego to the side, and take more risks emotionally.  Pride can be a great ally, but pride can hurt you if it induces a fear of being vulnerable, or embarrassed.

 

2. Always chase your dreams.  You will never regret the things that you tried / try your hardest to do.  If you try to follow your dreams and fail in completely achieving them, there is no way you’re going to regret making that effort.  Always chase your dreams.

 

Regret Type Number Two


Life is not to be lived in solitude.  Humans are tribal by nature.  Which means that this second type of regret is damn near unavoidable.  The second type of regret is the regret we will have about the things that we DID say, or the things that we DID do.

 

You’ve hurt people when you’ve acted out of raw emotion, and there is no way you could ever take those words or actions back.  Time doesn’t work that way.  Maybe you’ve acted rashly and irrationally out of anger, jealously, lust, envy, gluttony, or greed.  I know that I have acted rashly and irrationally many times in the past, and I still do no matter how hard I try not to.

 

So what can we do about it?  How can we minimize these inescapable forms of remorse?

 

Let’s talk about two ways I think we can avoid this second type of regret.

 

1. It is important to act out of emotion in the right way but in this case, you should probably be more conscious of your actions.  Try to think with the logical part of your brain before you accidently inflict pain on other people.  Meaning I want you consciously and purposely contemplating your instincts before you act upon them.

 

2. Try to breathe whenever you are in a position of overwhelming negative emotion.  Especially, when you are liable to deflect or redirect that negativity onto people.  The key thing will be to take calming, relaxing breaths (refer to chapter on breathing techniques) that will re-center you emotionally.

 


Your Personal Challenge:


Try to live your life looking forward, and don’t hold onto the avoidable or the unavoidable feelings regret.  Learn from your mistakes but remember that holding onto regret can & will never help you.

About the Author of : Your Life and Regret – קואצ’ר לחיים

Hi, my name is Claude Lee Massey and thanks for reading the article above!  I wrote the article because I wanted to help you. 

You see, I’ve been living in Tel Aviv for 10+ years and I know it can be a struggle living here as a foreigner.  Finding a job, living a happy life, and developing great relationships… are not always easy to do.

I remember the day I arrived in Israel I had NO money – NO friends – and NO job.

So, how did I go from that point to becoming a life coach (קואצ’ינג לחיים) and career coach (אימון אישי לקריירה)?

Here is my story:

About seven years ago (and after 15+ years of soul-searching), I had a powerful self-realization that I was put here on this planet to teach and to share the knowledge I have.   

Moreover, after this powerful revelation hit me I began to feel a powerful inner calling.  A relentless voice inside of me saying, “I have to open my own consulting business”.

Therefore, with my 15+ years of experience in the field of sales and customer service I decided to open a sales training company.

At this point, I had a full time job working for a high-tech company so on my day off, I found an accountant.  Then I hired him and had him file the proper paperwork to open a sales training company with the government.

I never thought that I would open my own business in Israel… but I did!

I decided to name my sales training company Sales Development Israel, and I began to use all of my spare time before work and after work creating training materials, and trying to acquire clients.

In addition, I was sending emails and cold calling companies in Tel Aviv, Herzliya, Ramat Gan, Jerusalem, Bat Yam, and Holon.

I was working like a maniac and doing everything in my power to generate momentum.  Great news is that I was able to find my first few clients!

However, something I immediately noticed was at the conclusion of my sales training workshops, two things would happen consistently happen: 

Firstly, I would receive feedback that my sales training workshops were providing massive value for the sales team.

This meant that the companies were happy with the service I provided… which was nice to know.

Secondly, one or two of the students in the courses would privately approach me.  These students would speak with me about their struggles not only in sales, but also in their lives.

Then one time, a female student offered to pay me for a one-on-one session outside of the office.  As a struggling entrepreneur, I accepted.  

She asked me to help her learn how to communicate more effectively, and to help her figure out a better career path.  We developed a plan, strategized, and executed. 

Another student, at another company, approached me and offered to pay me for my time to help prepare him for a job interview.  We developed a plan, strategized, and executed. 

Yes, he was planning to leave the sales job that he was at and yes, I helped him to do so.

Similarly, another student from another workshop, at another company, asked me to help them build their inner-confidence.  We developed a plan, strategized, and executed. 

This would happen again, and again…

Each of these wonderful people I began to work one-on-one with,  had their own unique challenge, and asked me for help.  Each time we developed a plan, strategized, and executed. 

They all knew that I was not certified or professionally trained, and still they would approach me, and offer to pay me for my time.

These first clients would call me their “Life Coach” or “Career Counselor“, and I was able to help them!

At the conclusion of our 3 to 5 one-on-one sessions, they each had taken took massive steps forward towards the results they wanted.

Each time we developed a plan, strategized, and executed successfully! 

Eventually, enough people paid me to sit down with them, and called me their Career Counselor or Life Coach… that I began to call myself a “Career Counselor” and ”Life Coach”.

Most people set out to become a trained and certified life coach (קואצ’ר , אימון אישי) or career counselor before ever having a client. 

However, I never said I wanted to be a life coach (אימון אישי לחיים) or a career counselor… this interesting and fulfilling profession came to me, literally.

In conclusion, that is the super-short story of how I began life coaching (תל אביב קואצ’ינג לחיים) and career counseling in Tel Aviv Israel and after all these years, I’m happy to say I have helped hundreds of people just like you!

 

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This article was titled: Your Life and Regret – קואצ’ר לחיים